It’s no surprise to me that I came in first in the naked 5k race. Did you see those boys trying to run naked? Their balls were flopping all over the place, it looked so painful. I don’t even know what it feels like and I feel sorry for them. What must it have been like in the wild, before humans invented underwear? It must have been a huge disadvantage to have balls hindering your running, your movement, everything. I’m so glad I’m a girl.